Sunday afternoon. That dangerous lull.

The house is quiet,  my head is pounding like it’s personally offended by my life choices.

Normally, this is the exact moment I would be in the kitchen making a coffee with a dramatic swirl of vegan cream and an unnecessary amount of sprinkles. A little sweet treat. A little pick me up. A little “I deserve this.”

But not today.

Because apparently I have decided to remove wheat and sugar from my diet.

Casually. Like that is normal behaviour.

My body is reacting like I have betrayed it. Headache. Sluggishness. Internal toddler tantrum screaming, just one biscuit will not hurt.

Honestly though, I know this is the adjustment phase. I have gone from quick comfort fixes to actual discipline. From spikes and crashes to stability. From sprinkles to self control.

And I will not lie, it is uncomfortable.

But so was feeling bloated. So was the inflammation. So was the constant up and down energy.

Growth rarely comes with sprinkles.

Tuesday, The ENT That Was Not an ENT

Tuesday morning we thought we were heading to an ENT appointment.

We were not.

It was oral surgery.

A while ago, I bought her some herbal tablets to help with her symptoms. They caused white spots in her mouth. She was referred on, we forgot about it, and suddenly we are driving an hour to the hospital for an appointment I barely remembered booking.

We were in and out quicker than you can count to five. We had actually left before the appointment time of 9.30am.

Two and a half hours. Six pounds parking. Five minute appointment.

After the epic one hour drive, it does make you think about how many hospital appointments are technically “wasted” each year. But equally, if you do not turn up and it is something important, you cannot undo that decision. So you go. You show up. You sit in traffic. You pay the parking.

And yes, I paid over six pounds because I thought it was an appointment for her nose.

That is another story.

Later that afternoon, we checked a letter from her neurologist online. Her MRI results are back, and they have found a small cyst on her pituitary gland. It warrants further investigation, and the Consultant Radiologist has recommended another MRI.

About a year and a half ago, when she saw a private paediatric endocrinologist, he mentioned it but said it was not sinister.

And this is where the whole Private versus NHS debate comes in.

I am actually relieved the NHS want to be thorough.

Thorough feels safe.

Wednesday: Hunger, Headaches and Hormones

Half term meant an 11-hour sleep.

Bliss.

My diet is… going. But I am constantly hungry. Not food noise exactly. More like menopause hunger, that primal, hormonal, “feed me immediately” feeling.

I cut carbs for three days. Big mistake.

My body cannot cope with low carbs. I get those awful banging headaches, especially if I’ve gone more than five hours without eating. Most mornings I fast until 11:30am and have a high-protein brunch, but an hour later I’m hungry again, despite drinking three litres of water and herbal tea.

It feels like I can’t win.

The GP Appointment

In the afternoon, I finally saw the doctor.

I’d sent in a long letter listing all my symptoms. They booked me in. The doctor I saw mentioned his wife isn’t well, which immediately shifted perspective; we’re all juggling something and wished her well.

He’s arranged blood tests, which I’m genuinely grateful for.

My allergy list seems to have doubled. The eczema is worse. I’m exhausted. Constantly hungry. The scales haven’t moved in six weeks despite eating between 1100–1400 calories a day. I had a positive ANA recently, and being told it “means nothing” isn’t exactly reassuring.

He asked what I thought was going on. I didn’t want to sound like a hypochondriac. I mentioned that the hand therapist suggested I had  Ehlers-Danlos syndrome (EDS). In my head, I’m also wondering about MCAS, because everything I "EAT" I'm allergic to!

This was my third request for further investigations.

But he listened.

And I’ve got blood tests booked for Thursday.

Sometimes progress doesn’t look dramatic. Sometimes it’s just another form, another test, another step forward.

Back to My Old Neck of the Woods

Thursday, we were back in my old neck of the woods for her dentist appointment, which thankfully went well.

Afterwards we went to our old café for lunch. I had literally had breakfast a few hours before but there I was studying the menu like it was a life decision.

Jacket potato with tuna or cheese and beans.

Comfort carbs calling my name.

Instead I chose an egg omelette with spinach, tomato and cheese.

Which meant I had clocked up four eggs in one day.

Four.

At one point in my life I would have spiralled over that. Too much. Too excessive. Too 1990s cholesterol panic.

But here is what actually happened.

I was not hungry later.

No biscuit negotiation. No dramatic energy crash. No wandering into the kitchen pretending I was just checking something.

Just steady.

It made me realise something. Maybe my body has not been asking for more food. Maybe it has been asking for more protein.

For someone in menopause, constantly hungry, trying to lose a stone, battling inflammation and mystery symptoms, that actually makes sense.

Also, interestingly, my banging headaches have gone since I reintroduced brown bread and potatoes back into my diet.

Three days low carb and my body absolutely revolted. Head pounding. Dizziness when standing. That slightly dazed, not fully here feeling.

Add complex carbs back in, headaches disappear.

It is almost like my body prefers balance over extremes.

How inconvenient for dramatic dieting.

Small Luxuries and Blood Tests

After lunch we both had our hair done. My daughter needed a haircut and while I was there I treated myself to a blow dry.

A tiny luxury.

But also practical. My hair is done for the week, one less thing to think about. Sometimes self care is not candles and affirmations. Sometimes it is simply removing one item from the mental to do list.

We came home, I rested for ten minutes, then went around the corner for my blood test.

Turned up early. Got seen early. Was home before my appointment time.

After this week’s epic hospital expedition, that felt like a win.

Now I am just intrigued.

Still feeling slightly dazed. Not fully here. Foggy. Tired. Hungry but trying. The scales have not moved for six weeks despite eating between 1100 and 1400 calories a day. My allergy list seems to be doubling. Eczema flaring. Positive ANA that apparently “means nothing,” which is not the most comforting phrase.

But this time the doctor listened.

This was my third request for further investigations and now the blood tests are done.

I showed up. I adjusted. I listened to my body. I pushed for answers.

Honestly though, this week has not been glamorous.

Sugar withdrawal. Four eggs. Hospital parking fees. MRI letters. Menopause hunger. Blood tests.

But maybe growth does not come with sprinkles.

Maybe it comes with persistence, protein, potatoes and a very good blow dry.